smatterings

You how you reach that certain level of drunk and you can hear everything really well? Not like a hangover where everything is fucking loud, but just drunk enough to be extremely aware of everything you hear. That's the point that I'm at in my cold. I'm not normally a loud eater, but now I can hear the food in my mouth crunching. It's a very odd feeling. Try this: Close your mouth and flick your tongue on the roof of your mouth (or your soft palate, if you're that talented). Typically, that sound should be pretty soft. For me, it sounds like footsteps. I'd rather be drunk.

I've discovered that this map business is a double edged sword. It's awesome because I get to see where the people who look at my blog generally live. But it doesn't get very specific about their location (I definitely live in Worthington, not Columbus) and it doesn't tell me who looks at it. Like the Columbus entries are basically anyone who lives in Franklin county. Not so helpful. Thank goodness it's pretty. I still want to know who in Grand Rapids and who in Chicago has been reading this. Come on people, show yourselves!

I'm in an angry-ish place. Bill finally pissed me off. Remember when I was feeling guilty for breaking up with him? Those feelings are completely gone now! He's been such an asshole to me recently, I don't care what he does to mess up his life any more than he already has. It's interesting... right after we broke up, I got a variety of responses. Some people were like, "Oh no! What happened?" and others were like, "Oh thank goodness you got rid of him!" One of my friends actually told me that he was glad that I stopped dating Bill because he thought I was settling. Several people told me that the whole time we were dating too. I didn't think it at the time, and I got really upset with those people, but now I'm starting to see that they're right. It wasn't even a hard thing to change for him to reach my level. All he had to do was have some semblance of social skills and make some friends. We even went to see I Love You Man when were went hiking in the Rockies last spring break. I hoped that he would get the hint, but no. It's just not normal for people to not have friends. Think about it. If a person has no friends, that means that no one takes an interest in them and that they don't take an interest in what other people do and say. That's the foundation of a romantic relationship! Anyway, now he's being incredibly mean and claiming that he was going to dump me before I dumped him. Right. New flash: When you're sobbing as your girlfriend dumps you, and your exact words are, "I thought we were getting better" you're not planning on dumping anyone. Sorry, but he cried too much for me to believe that. I hate it when guys cry, especially if I'm the cause of it. I don't care if you cry during Marley & Me; that shows that you have a soul. But crying over your failed relationship when it was mostly your fault to begin with? Where are your cajones?

I'm really tired of being at home. I've trained my body to expect to leave after being home for about a week, but this time I won't leave until August 29th. Yup. I finally got my move-in information for grad school! I have orientation on the 23rd, and my first class is on the 31st. It should be on the 30th, but I only have classes on Tuesdays and Thursdays. It makes me a little nervous that I have 3 classes and I'm only actually in class for about 5 hours in a week. One of my classes is an online class, but still... that's not a lot of time. And it probably means that I'm going to have a shit ton of work outside of class. So right now my weekends start on Thursdays after 5, and they run until Tuesdays at about 2ish. I didn't get an assistantship (Boo!) and as of right now, all of the jobs at the campus libraries are full, but I'm applying to work as a page in the library of the town ten minutes east of campus. It's not far, and I'm hoping that I'll be able to work through my fear of driving on winter roads before snow hits. I hate snow. Anyway, it's not much, but it's enough to pay for groceries and get me out of my apartment a little bit. I may try to pick up a campus job along the way too. Or maybe look into babysitting. Who knows!

I feel like this post is a marathon, but I've had a lot of time lately to sit around and think up things to say.

Since I lost my dental insurance in March, I've become increasingly more attentive to my teeth. I am super vigorous when it comes to brushing, and I spend tons of time on my gum line. I have a problem where I grind my teeth. In my sleep, when I'm stressed, when I'm driving, if I'm watching an intense episode of NCIS, it doesn't matter. I technically have a mouth guard I'm supposed to wear, but just like my retainer, I gave up on that after 6 months. I'm not even sure where it is now. I know it spent all of my senior year of college in the medicine cabinet in our bathroom, and I know I brought it home, but I haven't seen it since last summer. Anyway, when you grind your teeth, it's basically like you're pushing your teeth back into your gums, and it causes your gums to become inflamed and puffy. Try this: Take a mini marshmallow and a semi-sweet morsel like you would use to make chocolate chip cookies. Flip the morsel over so the pointy side is down and try to stick it into the marshmallow. BADA-BING! One inflamed gum line! Luckily, if I think about not grinding my teeth, I can control it, but that's not helpful when I sleep. This is where my magical friend mouthwash comes in. After fighting with my dentist over this problem for months (he kept insisting I wasn't brushing... I was, the puffiness was from my teeth being stupid), he caved and gave me prescription strength mouthwash. My next appointment all of the puffiness was gone. MAGIC! So now I'm an avid mouthwash user. This is why I had such a dilemma about whether or not to bring my mouthwash on the Western trip.

And I just wrote a long paragraph about my teeth. This is why I can't spend too much time in one place.

If you're looking for a laugh, or you just want to be creeped out, look through the personals ads on Craiglist. One guy I saw today bragged that he had a full time job, a car, an ex-wife, and a four-year-old son. Seriously. That's all he's bringing to the table? The novelty of owning your own car wears off for most people in the early part of college, and this guy was in his early 30s. Then again, he probably never went to college, and therefore missed that mark. Interesting observation: Most of the men seeking women posts in Columbus were from Grove City. Be ashamed of yourselves, Grovetucky!

Your best friend is not your girlfriend! (A cookie goes to whoever can tell me the artist and title for this lyric!)

~ Christine